This was the title of Byron Katie's first book and the whole process she uses really has the capacity to turn your life around. She devised a method of inquiry which she calls The Work. The Work helps us see where we are at war with reality by using a process of four questions and a turnaround, to achieve a better understanding of ourselves. She commonly refers to this process as Inquiry which leads to self-realization and the end of suffering. Rather than explain how the whole process works here anyone interested can go to www.thework.com where you really will find all you need to do it for yourself.
What does it mean in reality? Well exactly that! All we have is in reality and reality is in the actual experience of the moment we are in. In relationships, in work situations, in family get togethers for example how often do we bring a whole other drama along in our own heads. When we sit there with 'he said', 'she said' and remembered hurts, arguments, conflicts and sad memories floating in our thoughts, how present are we to what is actually going on right in front of our eyes? Can there be any room for resolution or forgiveness or healing or even for simply relating when we sit there mentally throwing big cauldrons full of a blend of old and often misinterpreted issues, faulty thinking, and judgments at each other? The real aim is to feel unconditional love and unconditional truth for our own selves and by understanding what this means it flows naturally to include the people and events in our lives. It may be hard to do this. It may involve facing uncomfortable thoughts and emotions. It may involve having a really good look in the mirror and unconditionally accepting the person looking back at us. We cannot argue with reality. To do so is a waste of energy and resource. We can only accept it understand it, embrace it and then be open to live in the present. And that is freedom.
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
The Weather...
I've been observing this summer just how much we are influenced by the weather. It's no accident that the sun is so often used as a symbol for the divine and for inspiration. Without our inner and outer sunshine we wither and fade and so sun deprivation can actually manifest as depression, negativity and general gloom! So what to do about it? Well I've just a few sugestions that really help me:
1. Take a holiday in the sun if you can (obvious but very therapeutic!)
2. Surround yourself with light colours. Introduce colour to your home, wear bright clothes, hang a bright sunny picture in a position where you see it most.
3. Listen to summer songs - light bubbly and full of fun to lift the spirits
4. Watch something or do something that makes you laugh every day
5. If sun deprivation really affects you physically get a light box, a daylight bulb and a himalayan salt lamp
6. Pick a positive thought and positive image to start and end every day. For example when you wake in the morning visualise yourself on a sunny beach or walking in a summer meadow, then think about all the things for which you are grateful. Try to return to that thought whenever you feel yourself slip during the day and really practise this before you go to sleep as it's very important for mental wellbeing that your thoughts before sleep are positive, cheerful and removed from whatever stresses are going on in your life.
7. Make yourself smile - even when you don't have anything to smile about! The facial muscles actually influence your mood so when the brain reads 'smile' signals it believe you are happy and releases the appropriate chemicals to verify this.. :)
1. Take a holiday in the sun if you can (obvious but very therapeutic!)
2. Surround yourself with light colours. Introduce colour to your home, wear bright clothes, hang a bright sunny picture in a position where you see it most.
3. Listen to summer songs - light bubbly and full of fun to lift the spirits
4. Watch something or do something that makes you laugh every day
5. If sun deprivation really affects you physically get a light box, a daylight bulb and a himalayan salt lamp
6. Pick a positive thought and positive image to start and end every day. For example when you wake in the morning visualise yourself on a sunny beach or walking in a summer meadow, then think about all the things for which you are grateful. Try to return to that thought whenever you feel yourself slip during the day and really practise this before you go to sleep as it's very important for mental wellbeing that your thoughts before sleep are positive, cheerful and removed from whatever stresses are going on in your life.
7. Make yourself smile - even when you don't have anything to smile about! The facial muscles actually influence your mood so when the brain reads 'smile' signals it believe you are happy and releases the appropriate chemicals to verify this.. :)
Seminars
Just a note to say sorry that I haven't posted seminar dates yet. It's been very busy and so unfortunately I have had to postpone all seminars until mid October. I'll post the dates as soon as I can. In the meantime if you want to go on the mail list then please click on Coaching & Seminars and email me via the email link there.
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